I Saw How Depressed We Were

I saw how depressed we were

Disfigured in the corners with crying

I saw the reasons for our depression

Every single one of us was dying

I saw the open door and the door clasp shut

I saw the question

And aknowledged I was not the first to ask it

I saw problems upon problems

All shutting into their own casket

All filing into the abyss like Lemmings following one another

All chatting and spreading their loneliness hollowing each other

I saw the grieving giants 

The deep cavern of secrets and “secrets to die with”

I saw the good book

Only used as something to lie with

I saw my own grave in a dream

And fired up awake in all of my being

To figure it

To shake off each thing put on me

To make me ignorant

I saw the fire

And the darkness and loathing

And the darkness

Approaching

Approaching

Approaching

Your Heart’s Afire

Your heart’s afire

So don’t come near me and my dreams soaked in gasoline

Don’t light my house you love you devil you arson

Your heart’s afire

And you will burn up half the city

And a million men will call you very pretty

And hoot and holler and go nutty

In your hands like a piece of puddy 

Your heart’s afire

Find a sea to extinguish it

Of blame

Not me

A tree

That will go up in flames

Not me 

A sea of gasoline

Ready to ignite and become and undo everything

Until it’s all undone

Your heart’s afire

And your blood burns

And every time that heart pumps

The world spins and turns

Your heart’s afire

And no one will care 

That you sear the flesh

And set the snare

And all who are caught ignite and change being

To not being

I am an ocean of gasoline

Waiting for your spark

To blow up 

And light all the dark

Onward Into The Death

Onward into the death

That comes only partially 

With held breath

Onward to the dying

The methods all fail

And made worse by trying

Onward to the dead

Where the lilies and daffodils grow wild

And I wrestle with it in my head

Ever since I was a little child

Onward to the death

That comes and goes with breath

And onward

Into it without any thought left

A song bird bereft 

Churning learning 

Wept

The forceful dream gone

My soul swept

Onward into the death

And Suddenly Writng Became Important

And suddenly writing became important

It became my entire purpose

The sun, the earth, the human beings

All had become so worthless

And suddenly writing became important

Once again

Nothing of my previous attitude

To remain

And suddenly writing increased tenfold in value

It became a nuisance 

I was writing as my father died

And he thought writing was useless

And suddenly 

I found myself

In words splayed like leaves 

Connecting like the branches of trees

And suddenly writing became more important than anything

And love

Was written within everything

And suddenly writing was all there was

Tapping away at it

Just because

Give Me A Break Of Heart

I find the path frightening 

Filled with bad lighting

And lightening

I find the wax and wane the same

Pivoting on the sphere

Livid and weary of wear

I find the ax sharpening

The love harkening 

The sun darkening

I find the total 

Filled in the fist of no return

To spin on the spinning earth

To churn and burn for one more day

When consciousness blinks

And life is put away